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A Powerful Lesson From Men

Jacks Smack 02042020

The aftermath of the Super Bowl surprises me. Instead of the “Wow it was an amazing upset. Look at Kansas City’s FIRST Bowl win in 50 years”, the conversation I am witnessing is all about the two women who hijacked the heavily-laden testosterone modern day gladiator event.

Rather than sitting under a parasol, fanning themselves, fainting salts at the ready in case the madness on the field became ‘too much’; these women were front and center making others wonder if what they were doing would become ‘too much’.

J.Lo and Shakira are spawning a plethora of articles in the NY Times, the Washington Post, and the like. They are generating memes, juxtapositioning Golden Girls’ Blanche Devereaux’ 50 in 1985 versus J.Lo’s 50 in 2020.

‘Hey, what about those Chiefs?’

I say we drive towards acceptance. And, at the risk of angering my gender, we begin at home – with one another.

Was it too sexy? Does J.Lo deserve to look that good at 50? What was going on with the camera people and their fascination for crotches… which, I personally think are some of the least interesting features on any human. Out of all the jumble of criticism, I cannot help but HEAR, loud and clear, women bashing women. WTF is that??? Jennifer Weiner’s Opinion piece in The NYTimes today I think called us ladies out the best.

They report that 102 million tuned in this past Sunday to watch the game. For silly argument sake, let’s say that half were men (we KNOW it was more). 51 million men showed up at someone’s house, a bar, in their own den to sit and watch this event. According to Health Line, the average American man 20 years and up weighs 197.9 pounds, their waist circumference is 40.2 inches, their height a little over 5’9, and their body fat, as a percentage, ranges between 23% to 31%.

‘Pass me the nacho and cheese dip, please’

This ‘average’ American male sat glued to the tv watching the elite athletes whose body fat comes in at 13 – 20% – run, pass, tackle.

I am NOT including the wall of man that comprises the defensive and offensive line… they HAVE to be BIG…. that’s their job!

Stay with me, I am going somewhere….. Or, more accurately stated, I am furthering the conversation begun by Jennifer in The New York Times.

Here’s the deal. There are NO articles, tweets, or Facebook posts that I have stumbled across whereby men are shaming the athletes for being … I don’t know…. too strong, too athletic, too rough. I haven’t seen one lament on how these multi-million dollar players ‘make’ these men feel shame or less than.
What is going on with us women? Why do we look at J.Lo and Shakira and blame them for our insecurities and shame?

This is the conversation we need to change. How can we expect to be taken seriously, accepted, appreciated in the world when we don’t afford ourselves the same courtesy?

I don’t look like J.Lo; just like most American males don’t look like Patrick Mahomes  or Jimmy Garoppoloa. Men are way kinder to one another; as they sit, open another beer, and revel in the 42 yard field goal, the herculean turnovers, the reasoning-defying speed of OTHER men. It doesn’t appear, at least to me, that the success and progress of these OTHER men affect their sense of pride and self.

I hate to say this ladies, but I strive to view the world a bit more like our men. I say this over and over again, it’s my Kuel Life Mantra: Collaboration over Competition. Make room at the table for J.Lo and Blanche Devereaux’; they both belong.

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