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Been To Hell And Back And Still Here – Ania Grimone

Ania Grimone Spotlight April 2023

Ania Grimone holds a master’s degree and has been a hands-on clinician of Chinese medicine for the last 23 years.

She holds certifications in Co-Active Coaching, VITA Sex, Love, and Relationship methodology, Psych-K, and breathwork. But more importantly, she’s done her own work. Self-described as having been to hell and back on a frequent flier program to heal and integrate her own deep developmental, relational, and sexual trauma.

Ania knows both, what it’s like to struggle, and what it takes to get through it. She’s not just an academic. Ania gets her hands dirty. As she says, “There is literally nothing you can throw at me that will make me flinch. I can hold you through all of it in a safe, sacred, non-judgmental, loving, compassionate, and supportive container.”

Kuel Life is honored to have Ania on the roster of our Thought Leaders. Ania speaks on the areas of sexuality and pleasure for us women in midlife and beyond.

A Little Insight Into Ania Grimone:

1. What makes me feel alive?

Learning something new, and generally getting out of my comfort zone. When I travel to a new country, ride a bike for 100 miles, tap into and integrate an old trauma, or learn a new way to orgasm. When I allow myself to be completely vulnerable in front of my partner or sign up for public speaking before I know what I am going to talk about. Many of these things don’t necessarily “feel good” all the time, but they help me appreciate the magic of living in this life and in this body. 

2. What habits, patterns, or beliefs are my greatest assets?

Insatiable curiosity is probably my most useful trait. The most useful belief is that life is magical, and if I just maintain a degree of skepticism about the thoughts, judgments, and neurosis that my mind is conjuring, and stay present, the magic will unfold. 

The behavior that served me best is to not make sudden moves. I don’t make quick decisions, and certainly not when I am emotional. 

I am also very good at not judging unconsciously. I would lie if I said I don’t judge at all. Of course I do, but it is a conscious process that usually entails a fairly rigorous examination before I make a decision. I usually subscribe to live and let live. But not always 😉 

3. What boundaries work for me. Are there any I need to rethink?

Understanding myself and being aware of my needs without apologizing for them helps me know when to say yes and no to things. I am an introvert, and commitments to things too far in advance are very stressful for me. Oftentimes, I protect my energy and need solitude. I am much more pleasant and engaging when I honor this need. 

My favorite phrase is “let me get back to you”. It slows things down and allows me to tune into my authentic yeses and nos. Game changer. 

4. What gives me energy and how do I energize other people?

Many things energize me depending on what space I am in at any given moment. It can be solitary walk in the woods, 50 mile bike ride, sensual dance, deep meditation, cuddle session with my cat, making love, wind in my hair, beautiful piece of music, rich piece of dark chocolate, sitting with women and talking about our heart’s yearnings, fire on full moon, client’s breakthrough, talking to my son about nothing in particular, unexpected moment of presence. I feel that at any moment the energy is for the taking if I just notice. 

I energize others by being deeply present to them and to their needs. By not making them wrong for being who and how they are. By making them feel seen, heard, validated, and understood. Even when I do not agree. This, I find, is the most basic human desire, and it is mind, body, and soul food. 

5. What is really most important to me?

Love and freedom are my most important values. It is important to me to leave people better than when I found them, by offering those to them. I want to spread joy and aliveness, to wake women up to their forgotten magic, power, joy, and sensuality. It feels to me like painting the grey world with color

6. How do I create joy for myself?

All the things that energize bring me joy. I don’t have a recipe. The more present I am, the more I can find joy in the most ordinary things. Having a clean house, driving in traffic listening to a cool book, having a mundane conversation with my 22 year old. I think what is wrong is always available, but so is what is right. Sometimes I can even find joy in drama. It makes me feel alive, and feeling alive and like I am here, in my life, participating, brings me joy

7. How can I keep on evolving?

There is Chinese proverb: Before enlightenment carry water, chop wood. After enlightenment, carry water, chop wood”. I live by that. Keep being curious, keep questioning assumptions, keep a beginner’s mind, and show up without resistance. Don’t cling to the past. Life evolves. It is its nature. I just need to show up and I will evolve. 

8. What legacy do I want to leave behind?

I want to make people realize how much of their own aliveness they leave on the table by letting their minds run the show. The mind’s nature is to help us survive by building walls, pursuing having more, accomplishing more, doing more. It is always about more. Mind is never satisfied. It keeps moving the goal post. It disconnects us from the body, where pleasure, joy, awe, presence, and sensual experience live. Bodies become receptacles of trauma, fraught with pain, suffering, and disease. 

I want to remind women of the depth of their own wisdom, so they can get off the hamster wheel and realize how magical they are, and how much creative power they actually possess. 

9. Here are my top three PRO-AGING tips? This is how I “pro-age” in today’s world.
    1. Do not buy into any statements that say : now that you are xyz years old, it is not appropriate to xyz. You decide. Nobody else will dictate rules for your own aliveness, pleasure, sexiness, joy, activity, etc. 
    2. Cultivate loving, sexy, respectful, safe, and honoring relationship with your body. Offer it love, compassion, gratitude for how it is. Daily. It is a miracle. It deserves to be worshipped. Literally
    3. Cultivate connections and elevate other women. Dance together and remember the ancient wisdom in your bones. Whether you are a maiden, mother, crone, or sage, we all have immeasurable value. Remember and help others remember. 
10. Why am I Kuel Life Thought Leader?

To remind women how amazing, powerful, and magical they are. To reconnect them to their bodies. And, to help them off the societal train that systematically disconnects them from their wisdom, their instincts, and from each other. I am here to heal our collective trauma, to resurrect the sexual aliveness, and to invite women to choose themselves. This way we all heal. 

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