As if Divorce in midlife isn’t hard enough, WTF is this world coming to…right?
Couldn’t we all have just divorced in our own little hell – without adding all the other pain the world is offering right now?
LOL. If only life were that simple, hmm?
“Depression is a natural reaction to divorce, pandemics, oppression.”
Checking Out And Struggling:
The fact is, you’re struggling. The world is struggling. And all you want to do is check out. Netflix and chill. Self Medicate…with whatever substance or action, natural or otherwise, that just numbs you. Helps you forget. If just for a moment, right?
It’s ok. I’m validating you. Depression is a natural reaction to divorce, pandemics, oppression. Anxiety is a natural reaction to feeling unsafe, insecure. These are unprecedented times. It’s valid to want to find easy coping mechanisms.
You Can Check Out. Just Come Back, Ok? Don’t Check Out Of Your Life:
I know in our patriarchal world, taking time for healing is frowned upon. It’s a sign of weakness. The world wants you to push through, don’t feel, “Man Up”.
Well my dear, guess what? You are a woman. And women were created to feel. It is our superpower.
This dis-regulation in the world around you — on top of the imbalance in your body and dis-regulation of emotions plus hormones — is A LOT. So, let’s train your triggers. That way you can move BEYOND Netflix and wine so you CAN engage in life and reap the greatest of rewards.
You didn’t break your heart wide open in divorce for nothing. Take advantage of this opportunity to heal in a way that honors who you are like you’ve never done before. And, at the same time, manage through these unprecedented experiences in an embodied way so you CAN lead the life you want to live no matter what.
“Triggers poke at parts of you that just want to be seen and heard.”
You CAN Train Your Triggers:
Checking out is just one of your support mechanisms for feeling unsafe, insecure, afraid, unstable — you name it. However, it’s just resisting what’s bothering you. These days it’s a valid response. But it won’t work forever.
At some point, emotions will get the best of you.
Checking out is just your reaction to a trigger. One that feels shitty, most likely.
Often, when you just recognize a trigger, its power over you gets reduced dramatically. Triggers poke at parts of you that just want to be seen and heard.
Checking out. Ignoring your triggers. It’s just ignoring parts of you.
Shisa. Aren’t you tired of being ignored?
Girlfriend, you’re halfway through your life, there are parts of you crying to be recognized — don’t ya think it’s about time?
I’m dropping a link for TRAINING YOUR TRIGGERS here. Download it and get into it.
“You’re not just a divorced woman. You’re a multi-dimensional multi-storied human being.”
It’s So Worth The Work. You’re Worth The Work. I Promise:
Checking out once in a while is ok. So is flying off the handle. All reactions and feelings are valid, to a point. However, I promise you, when you pay attention to what your body wants to express and feel — true healing begins.
Heal from your divorce AND from everything else. You’re not just a divorced woman. You’re a multi-dimensional multi-storied human being. And, when the parts of you longing to be heard get recognized, you can become whole. Moreover, wholeness is what allows you to create and lead a truly exceptional life from here on out.
Not Just Ok. Not Just Fine. A Spirited, Joy-Fueled, Soul-Lead Life:
“Really, Jenn? — Sounds a bit overdramatic to me. “
I get it. After having your world rocked and the rug swept out from under you, an exceptional recovery sounds a bit much. Even impossible.
But it’s not. Plenty of women are doing the work so they can live large and full – fuller than ever before – lives.
You can have this too.
But, not if you check out.
XOXO you know I feel you, Sister. Above all, breathe in that fear of feeling and you can breathe out extraordinary peace. I promise!
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About the Author:
Jenn Krusinski is a Holistic Life Coach, mom to three feminist and highly opinionated daughters and a woman who found herself at the crossroads of Midlife + Divorce at 47. After feeling her way through the grief and doing “all the things” to come out the other side still standing, Jenn decided it was time to switch gears and work with women like her who want to reimagine life after divorce — Becoming WHOLE, IGNITED and BRAVE! You can follow Jenn’s “real talk” on Instagram instagram.com/jennkrusinski and find out more about her coaching programs — Be Crazy Brave and Let Shit Go at jennkrusinski.com.