Akaisha Kaderli retired at the age of 38. She and her husband, Billy, are recognized retirement experts and internationally published authors on topics of finance, world travel and medical tourism. We at Kuel Life are thrilled to have Akaisha as a Guest Blogger.
There is power in story telling. There is power in community. There is power in sharing. The more we know about one another; the more we understand; the more powerful we become.
We invite all of the KuelWomen out there to share their stories with us.
This is Akaisha’s:
KUEL LIFE: What are you pursuing now, after 60, that surprises you or might appear to others as if it’s come out of left field?
AKAISHA: Since my husband and I have been traveling as a lifestyle for the last 3 decades, I have various levels of friendships and with people of different cultures, ages and beliefs. No one person or group knows me continuously, so my friends who knew me as a professional don’t know me as the traveler and writer I am now. Those whom I have met on the road might not know about my artistic pursuits and passions.
My indigenous friends would only know me as a neighbor or as a volunteer, and certainly, my professional friends would never guess my spiritual inclinations.
What I am pursuing now with more focus – and that would surprise most in any of those groups listed above – is my love of the body/mind connection and how it relates to health. And I love learning about quantum physics, morphic fields, resonance and vibration as it relates to how we experience our personal world
KUEL LIFE: What’s a typical day like for you?
AKAISHA: Our lifestyle is one of travel and movement, photo taking, note taking, enjoying experiences of different countries, indigenous, local people, cuisines and culture. It’s a National Geographic Lifestyle.
If we are on the road, then we share our photo stories on our website to give an insight into a world that others may never see. Since we focus on Financial Independence, World Travel and Medical Tourism, we write articles for publications wanting that information offered to their readers. This is very exciting and creatively challenging for us.
If we have “parked” ourselves for a bit, then typically, I get up early and spend some time on the yoga mat. After breakfast, I answer correspondence from our website, prepare a story to publish, and many days I go to the open air market to purchase fresh fruits, vegetables, meats and supplies.
Often times we have guests from out of country come visit us at whatever location we might be in. So in that case we might meet them for morning coffee, lunch or an early evening at the local watering hole or tapas bar.
KUEL LIFE: With what do you struggle?
AKAISHA: I am giving up struggle. Been working on it for a long while.
Struggling keeps me locked into something that’s not working – a relationship, a perspective, an expectation – and it saps my energy. It feels like a “churning, churning” and isn’t very productive. I won’t get to a solution if I am playing tug of war with something.
If I find myself “struggling” with something then it’s a signal to me that I have closed down somewhere (Anger? Fear? Judgment? Fatigue?) or that I am looking where the answer is NOT. I find that I need to re-define my relationship with whatever is going on – step back and give it some room.
I prefer when things fall into place easily and in a natural manner without struggle. Then I know I’m on the correct path for me. If I’m struggling, then sometimes I have to simply drop the matter at hand, and come back later with a clear mind.
KUEL LIFE: How do you motivate yourself and stay motivated?
AKAISHA: I let my dreams pull me forward.
KUEL LIFE: What advice would you give fellow women about aging?
AKAISHA: Be who you are, and give from that place where you have decades of experience and insight. Surround yourself with loving friends, drop the people who create drama and who are overly critical. They are not happy! You are not that extra pound, or that new wrinkle. You are So. Much. More. Laugh often, open up to new ideas, restaurants, and perspectives. Seek what you love. Happiness is a worthwhile pursuit.
KUEL LIFE: What does vulnerability mean to you? What has the ability to make you vulnerable?
AKAISHA: In my experience, there are two kinds of vulnerability. One kind elicits feelings of shame, “not-enough-ness,” humiliation, and that sort of raw feeling where we feel exposed or helpless and desire protection. It is fear-based. The other kind of vulnerability is where our power comes from.
Maybe we have touched another human being or animal in a sense of connection, like Spirit-to-Spirit. We have heard music that shakes us up and gives us chills or makes us weep. We have realized the power of the ocean, the majesty of the mountains, the sweetness of a newborn human or animal.
Many things make me feel this sort of vulnerability – fresh fallen snow in the morning sunlight, a baby asleep in my arms, someone who is dying who totally trusts you not to harm them, the opening of the heart with someone you love. Sharing one’s truth with someone who receives it with respect.
The negative kind of vulnerability, I stay away from.
KUEL LIFE: What are three events that helped to shape your life?
AKAISHA: Moving to California from Ohio on my own when I was twenty-one. I had $1,000 and no job.
My husband and I buying our restaurant in a coastal town of California when we were twenty-seven. We just got back from 6 months in Europe and purchased our place with no money down. It was totally funded with personal capital – that is, our word, our reputation, our promise, our hard work.
Retiring from the conventional working world when I was thirty-eight in 1991. It was an unpaved path, with some rocky personal roads, and we only had the security of self-reliance.
KUEL LIFE: Who influenced you the most in life and why?
AKAISHA: My Mother and my Father – for completely different reasons. My Mother was not there for us emotionally when we were young. She had pressing issues of her own that spilled over into our family life affecting our finances, our social standing, and our sense of self. All of this deeply wounded us in many ways. She eventually got on the right track and blossomed into a powerful, creative, vibrant , amazing, impressive, dynamic woman.
I learned from this personal saga. My Father was devoted and loyal to a fault. He did not abandon us when many other fathers and husbands might have. He was a good listener, and in many ways, my spiritual mentor. He was kind, sensitive, tender, and I knew he loved me. We were able to communicate well together and he was an outstanding Father. I learned the pros and cons of his personality type. They both left me emotionally and spiritually richer.
KUEL LIFE: What is the best advice you’ve been given from another woman?
AKAISHA: What I learned didn’t come as advice, it came as a result of a pain-filled betrayal. But what I learned was two things – I am a good person and no one can take that away from me. Ever. And two, Happiness is a worthwhile pursuit. I did not have that in my makeup previous to her friendship and treachery. Looking back now, I couldn’t be more grateful for these lessons. They were life-changing.
KUEL LIFE: What woman inspires you and why?
AKAISHA: I have been inspired by women like Marie Curie, Amelia Earhart, and Kathryn Hepburn because they were themselves. They didn’t allow society to define them or keep them in a box not of their making. They contributed to society from the place of their authenticity. They were strong, admirable and inspiring.!
KUEL LIFE: Are you grown-up?
AKAISHA: Haha! I’m not exactly sure what that means, but I can tell you that I think I was born “old.” I am an old soul. I was a profound thinker as a child, and loved to analyze people and situations. I valued my privacy, was hard working and loyal. I loved school.
My style of childhood was a bit strict, so I didn’t know how to play very much. What was thrilling to me was going to the library or an ancient history/anthropology museum! I was such a geek! The freedom of laughter and silliness came later in life for me. Now I’m younger in many ways than I was decades ago.
KUEL LIFE: What do you do for self-care?
AKAISHA: I love to do yoga, exercise, get out into nature, and if I can I get with my art supplies, I’m entranced for hours. I like to meditate, read, spend time with girlfriends, Skype with my sister in the States. I enjoy peace and quiet, no chaos emotionally or physically. Massages are lovely. Sometimes I’ll get an acupuncture “tune-up.”
KUEL LIFE: And last but definitely NOT least: What are the top three things on your bucket list?
AKAISHA: To continue on my path of personal freedom from emotional blackmail – from anyone, for any reason. I want to get back with my art supplies again and produce my mixed media pieces. I would then gift them away to friends or to local organizations that raise money for their cause. I want to spend time in Italy, Greece, and Croatia so I can photograph my journey and write about my insights. And, being a foodie, I want to experience that wonderful cuisine! I can’t wait!