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Of Scotch and Poison: The Encounter With The Mosquito Nemesis

Jacks Smack 07232023

I recently attended a scotch-tasting event, graciously hosted by a friend of a friend in Chicago. 

Little did I know that the evening would take an unexpected and alarming turn, thanks to a guest who shall remain nameless to protect the guilty. Let’s just call her “The Mosquito Nemesis.” She carried with her an unassuming weapon of mass destruction – a full family-sized can of RAID insect killer. And oh boy, what she did with it was beyond comprehension.

Out Of Nowhere:

With a can of RAID gripped tightly in her hand, she proceeded to spray the poisonous mist with reckless abandon.”

As all the guests were arriving, the cozy ambiance and the anticipation of tasting some fine scotch filled the air. The host’s backyard was a picturesque oasis, with lush greenery, a variety of plants, and even some promising yet-ripened tomatoes. I mingled with the other guests, excited to get to know my dear friend’s companions. I was relishing the camaraderie and shared love for all things scotch. But then, out of nowhere, The Mosquito Nemesis made her grand entrance into this idyllic scene.

With a can of RAID gripped tightly in her hand, she proceeded to spray the poisonous mist with reckless abandon. The assault on the invading mosquitoes began, but it quickly escalated into a full-blown massacre of any living creature in her path. I sat there in sheer horror, unable to tear my eyes away from the bizarre spectacle unfolding before me.

In her quest to eliminate the pesky mosquitoes, she unleashed a deadly mist upon the ants, bees, and any other unsuspecting insect that had the misfortune of crossing her path. The idea of those tiny creatures writhing in agony, caught in the crossfire of The Mosquito Nemesis’s fury, was heart-wrenching. The once vibrant backyard was now tainted with the stench of poison. I am certain there was a film of RAID on my person as well. 

Paralyzed By Shock:

“the other guests looked on as if it were just another mundane evening activity”

As I watched in dismay, I felt conflicted. Part of me desperately wanted to stop this madness, to intervene and save the innocent creatures facing an untimely demise. Yet, I was paralyzed by shock, unable to comprehend the absurdity of the situation. It felt like time slowed down, and each second stretched into an eternity as I wrestled with my conscience.

I glanced around, expecting others to share my concern, but to my astonishment, they remained eerily passive. It was as though the absurdity of the scene rendered them speechless and motionless, just like me. The Mosquito Nemesis continued her rampage, seemingly oblivious to the destruction she was causing, and the other guests looked on as if it were just another mundane evening activity.

The realization that I was not alone in my inaction did little to assuage my guilt. I knew I should have done something, said something, to put an end to this reckless annihilation. But fear of confrontation and a desperate desire to avoid conflict held me back. I kept telling myself that surely someone else would step in, that surely this madness would stop before any real harm was done.

Unsuspecting Tomatoes:

However, that hope was shattered when I saw the poisonous mist settle on the host’s yet-ripened tomatoes. It was as if a dagger had pierced my heart. Those tomatoes, which had been lovingly nurtured, were now contaminated with the very poison meant to protect them. My stomach churned with regret, and I felt complicit in this act of wanton destruction.

I will not stay quiet the next time my inner voice is screaming at me to take action.”

In that moment, I was disappointed in myself and in all the other guests who allowed this to happen. We were all passive witnesses to an ecological catastrophe in a backyard. The sanctity of life, no matter how small or insignificant it might seem, should have mattered more to us than a few bothersome mosquitoes.

Looking back, I realize that sometimes, it takes a moment of shock and disbelief to jolt us out of our complacency. This incident taught me the importance of speaking up and taking action when witnessing something so far removed from anything remotely sane or normal. I vowed never again to remain silent in the face of such senseless destruction.

The Mosquito Nemesis emptied the RAID can and the event continued as if nothing had happened. But for me, it was a lesson learned the hard way. The memory of that fateful evening will forever serve as a reminder to me. I will not stay quiet the next time my inner voice is screaming at me to take action. But for now I will think twice before picking off a couple of vine-ripened tomatoes and popping them directly into my mouth. At least in any garden in Uptown Chicago. 

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