Kim Muench, Becoming Me Thought Leader
Social media is everywhere and I get asked often: “Can I get some parenting tips for social media usage for my adult daughter?”
Here’s a real question I recently answered: “Help! How can I talk to my 20-year-old daughter about her constant use of social media without sounding like I’m criticizing her? It’s driving me nuts that she spends literally every free moment on her phone!”
Discussing social media use with your daughter requires a thoughtful and non-judgmental approach. It’s important to understand social media is a significant part of her social life and identity.
How To Start A Conversation With Your Children Over Using Social Media:
My suggestion is that you start the conversation by expressing your concern without sounding accusatory. For example, you might say, “I’ve noticed that you spend a lot of time on social media, and I’m curious about how it affects you. Can we talk about it?”
6 Parenting Tips For Social Media Usage:
“My suggestion is that you start the conversation by expressing your concern without sounding accusatory.”
1. Acknowledge The Positive Aspects:
Recognize the benefits of social media, such as staying connected with friends, networking opportunities, and access to information. This shows her you understand its value and are not simply dismissing it as negative.
2. Express Your Concerns Calmly:
Share your concerns in a calm and caring manner. Instead of saying, “You’re always on your phone,” try, “I sometimes worry that spending too much time on social media might impact your well-being or distract you from other important things.” This phrasing focuses on your feelings and concerns rather than criticizing her behavior.
3. Ask For Her Perspective:
Encourage your daughter to share her thoughts and experiences about social media. Ask open-ended questions like, “How do you feel after spending time on social media?” or “What do you enjoy the most about it?” Listening to her perspective can provide valuable insights and make her feel respected.
4. Discuss Balance And Boundaries:
Talk about the importance of balance and setting boundaries. Suggest exploring ways to manage social media use without dictating specific rules. For example, you might say, “Do you think setting aside certain times of the day for social media and other times for offline activities could be helpful?”
“Suggest exploring ways to manage social media use without dictating specific rules.”
5. Offer Support And Alternatives:
Offer your support in finding a healthy balance. Suggest alternative activities you can enjoy together, such as going for a walk, cooking a meal, or having a tech-free family game night. This can help her see the value in offline interactions and create opportunities for quality time together.
6. Lead By Example:
Model healthy technology use by setting your own boundaries with social media and digital devices. Show her you value real-life interactions and personal time, which can positively influence her behavior.
By approaching the topic with empathy, understanding, and a focus on mutual respect, you can have a productive conversation with your daughter about social media use. This approach not only addresses your concerns but also fosters open communication and strengthens your relationship.
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About the Author:
Kim Muench (pronounced minch, like pinch with an “m”) is a Jai (rhymes with buy) Institute for Parenting Certified Conscious Parenting Coach who specializes in working with mothers of adolescents (ages 10+). Knowing moms are the emotional barometer in their families, Kim is passionate about educating, supporting and encouraging her clients to raise their children with intention and guidance rather than fear and control. Kim’s three plus decades parenting five children and years of coaching other parents empowers her to lead her clients into healthier, happier, more functional relationships with compassion and without judgment.
You can find out more about her mission and services at www.reallifeparentguide.com. She is on Facebook at Real Life Parent Guide, Instagram, and on LinkedIn as well.
