Midlife Shaman: Maria da Silva
Sisterhood for women over 50 becomes less about convenience and more about survival, truth, and the kind of connection that carries us through life’s hardest seasons.
Love Without Roses: The Sacred Circle of Sisterhood
February arrives wrapped in red roses and dinner reservations. Love is in the cold, frigid-possibly snow-flaked-air. Couples massages are booked. Cards are signed. Chocolates are exchanged.
In February, we talk a lot about love. The emphasis, of course, is on romantic love. Friendship gets a mention. Children exchange valentines at school.
But there is a deep and profound love we often overlook-especially as women over 50: the love we share with other women. The kind that feels like sisterhood, even when there is no shared bloodline.
These are the women we speak to almost daily. The ones we meet for coffee, walk the woods or the neighborhood with, or who have held our hands through grief and sadness. These women are not just friends. They are sisters.
Sisterhood is not about blood; it is about belonging.
And it takes time.
What Sisterhood Really Is
Sometimes the connection feels instantaneous at first meeting-a recognition, a familiarity-but true sisterhood requires months and years of cultivation and nourishment. It is a rare and precious bond, built slowly through trust, shared truths, and showing up again and again.
This kind of relationship differs from casual friendships or social connections, which also matter but often hold limits. In those spaces, we edit ourselves. We share selectively. We perform a little.
Why Sisterhood for Women Over 50 Matters More Than Ever
Sisterhood offers emotional safety.
There is no competition.
No fixing.
No performance.
With our sisters, we are who we are-without judgment.
Our closest women friends mirror us back to ourselves. They reflect who we are now, how we are truly feeling, and how we are navigating whatever life has placed in front of us. We become witnesses for one another-in laughter and joy, and in sorrow and grief. This witnessing is healing. And healing creates bonding. Over time, we come to know one another’s souls.
There is profound power in being known and accepted without explanation.
Sisterhood often shows up quietly: a shared meal, a check-in text, walking side by side without needing to fill the silence. And when life becomes difficult-a heartbreak, an illness, a loss-these women do not step back. They step closer.
With our sisters, we wear fewer masks. We dare to speak uncomfortable truths. They are not only with us; they are for us.
Less striving.
More tenderness.
In sisterhood, we choose depth over quantity. And trust, always, is a two-way street.
Chosen Sisters and Sacred Bonds
Some women are blessed with both biological sisters and chosen sisters. My baby sister, Jorgina, died when she was five months old. Because of that loss, all the sisters in my life are spiritual sisters. And yet the bond I feel with them is as real and as deep as the relationship I imagine I might have had with her.
In true sisterhood, support is both given and received – without keeping score. When one needs, the other offers. We allow ourselves to be held, releasing the need to always be the “strong one.” There is strength, too, in vulnerability.
As Brené Brown so eloquently reminds us:
“Vulnerability is not weakness; it’s our greatest measure of courage.”
An Invitation This February
In this month of love and Valentine’s, I invite you to honor your sisterhood.
Name your sisters.
Say their names out loud.
Call one.
Write a note or a letter.
Invite her for a walk or share a meal.
Better yet, create space for one honest conversation-no fixing, no rushing, no performing. Just presence.
Let your sisters know what they mean to you.
Love is not only found in romance. It lives in the women who walk beside us, who hold us steady, who know our stories and stay anyway.
Call out to your sisterhood with gratitude and love.
I know you have one.
A Simple Sisterhood Practice
- Choose one woman who feels like a sister
- Reach out this week with one sentence of truth (not logistics)
- Example: “I was thinking about how much your presence steadies me. Thank you for being in my life.”
Small acts of acknowledgment deepen connection-and keep sisterhood alive.
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About the Author:
Maria da Silva is a practicing shaman, writer and traveler who lives in Plymouth, Massachusetts and travels frequently to her home islands of the Azores. The founder of Wise Shaman Within, she is bringing peace, healing, and light to the world one client and one workshop at a time. Maria provides individual client sessions and also facilitates workshops in both the USA and Portugal. Visit her website: Wise Shaman Within.
