The week leading up to my birthday found me somewhat pensive. I churned in my own head, reflecting on the speed of life.
I am truly confused, puzzled. So not kidding or exaggerating when I state: “I have no idea how I could be 56”.
In so many ways, I feel as if I am just starting out. I just birthed a new business. I’m about to embark on a fun new adventure this Fall with three brilliant women (more to say about that in the near future). My kid is not fully launched. And, I have yet to begin my ‘live all over the world one AirBnB at a time’ phase.
See what I mean?
I’m just beginning. So, how on this green earth can I be 56?
OK, so it’s not crazy old. I know. But, let’s start doing some math. Simple math; because I don’t typically do math in public. Let’s just say, generously, that I can keep this pace up until I’m 80. I’m playing economist here and throwing darts blindfolded. So, 80-56 leaves – 24 years.
How did my ‘time on planet’ bank account get so small?
Let’s Face Some Facts.
“in my 40s – I thought time limitless”
If I’m to be brutally honest, the state of affairs of the chassis in which I ride around, is starting to show some ‘jalopy-ish’ characteristics. Make no bones about it; I have been fully using my body for decades now and the wear and tear is real.
When I was younger – as far back as in my 40s – I thought time limitless. That was my decade of martial arts; and, outside of broken bones, bruises, and torn ligaments I was unstoppable. My machine performed for me consistently and even surprised me by standing up to the crazy challenges I threw its way.
Fast Forward 10+ Years
“The list of things to achieve or experience isn’t diminishing.”
My mileage is now showing. My right arm doesn’t straighten anymore so I’ve had to ‘adjust’ the way I do push-ups, plank, renegade rows, et al. Somehow, I have half the hair on my head. And, now my mouth is issuing a recall on a couple of teeth. Sigh, it makes me miss the cracked ribs and broken fingers of my 40s.
And, in this lies the bewilderment and a touch of melancholy. My heart and spirit are living in a Universe of limitless time and potential. The list of things to achieve or experience isn’t diminishing. As a matter of fact, it expands. Each time I am presented, or gifted, a novel exciting opportunity, I say ‘YES’. The notion of ‘slowing down’ or ‘being content’ with what I’ve accomplished thus far is incomprehensible to me. I don’t know how to stop dreaming, wanting, achieving.
If 24 years is the ‘magic’ number then I better get busy. I refuse to ‘slow-down’, I’ll just work around the problems that come with the body I’ve been issued. For me there is no other choice. But, I would be lying if I didn’t confess my occasional self-doubt and mini-pity-party moments.
So, I plank and renegade row on my knees. And, I sometimes wear hair extensions to boost my emotional spirit and help myself feel ‘pretty’ again. The oral care industry and I have several dates lined up on the calendar. After all, the technology is available and I want my teeth with me for my around the world adventures. I like to smile in photos – in addition to the pearly whites, it shows-off the crows feet that I’ve earned from 56 years of living large.