The best permission slips for midlife women aren’t signed by a boss, a partner, or a committee. They’re signed by you.
The Permission Slip You’ve Been Waiting For
Spoiler alert: You’re the one who gets to sign it.
Looking back, I see many of my life’s “accomplishments” more as a series of permissions.
Permission to leave a job that fed my sense of accomplishment more than it fed my heart. Permission to stop defining myself by being indispensable to everyone else. Permission to move to Mexico. Permission, at 60, to become a beginner again and start a wellness business for women … not because I had all the answers, but because I wanted the accountability of living the message myself. Permission, despite the naysayers, to paddle back out into the ocean after 767 days away from surfing.
To be clear, none of those permissions arrived in the mail, and no committee voted. No wise elder tapped me on the shoulder and declared, “Congratulations, Diane Amelia. You are now officially allowed.”
Nope. Each meaningful change began the same way: I reached a point where staying the same felt harder than changing.
The Gold Stars We Chase
Like many women, I spent decades collecting gold stars. Good grades. Strong work ethic. Reliability. Competence. I became wonderfully efficient at being the woman everyone could count on. It brought fascinating opportunities, lifelong friendships, and a career I genuinely appreciated.
It also taught me something unexpected …
Being Capable And Being Called Are Not The Same Thing
Just because I could organize mountains of projects didn’t necessarily mean that was how I wanted to spend the rest of my life. My competence had morphed into my identity, and stepping away from it felt surprisingly vulnerable. Who was I if I wasn’t the one who always had the answers? Who always fixed things? Who always came through?
A Better Question
Somewhere along the way, I started asking a different question: “What would I do if I already believed I was allowed?” If I just gave myself permission?
The answers changed everything, including me. I’d say no without writing a doctoral dissertation explaining why. I’d exercise because I love feeling strong, not because I was trying to “get skinny.” I’d protect my mornings. I’d spend more time creating and less time proving. I’d choose joy way more often. I’d stop apologizing for wanting a life that feels as good on the inside as it looks from the outside.
Self-Care Is Self-Permission
Perhaps that’s one of the greatest invitations of this chapter. We no longer have to earn our place in the world. We get to decide how we want to inhabit it.
That decision doesn’t mean you’re becoming reckless or egomaniacal. It means you’re becoming intentional. Caring for yourself isn’t in competition with caring for others. In fact, it’s what makes your generosity sustainable.
Movement. Nourishing food. Rest. Quiet moments. Time with people who lift you up instead of wear you out. These aren’t luxuries reserved for women who have everything else handled. They’re the foundation that allows us to handle everything else.
The Slip: Permission Slips For Midlife Women, Signed By You
Sometimes I imagine finally receiving the permission slip I’d been waiting for all those years. Heavy cream-colored paper. Gold embossing. And two simple words:
Permission Granted.
You are free to:
- Change your mind.
- Take up space.
- Become stronger.
- Rest before you’re exhausted.
- Learn something completely new.
- Wear the bright lipstick.
- Book the trip.
- Ask for help.
- Say no.
- Say yes.
- Surprise yourself.
And there, at the bottom of that beautiful page, my signature sparkles.
Trust Yourself More Than Your Fear
Think about one dream you’ve flirted with but postponed while waiting to feel ready. Maybe you’ve been waiting until you retire. Lose the weight. Have more money. Feel more confident. Or hear someone else say, “You should absolutely do that.”
That day may never come, but luckily, it doesn’t need to.
The permission I was waiting for was never sitting in someone else’s hands. It had been in my hands, just like yours is in yours.
This is your time. You don’t have to earn permission to become more fully yourself.
You simply have to say yes to you.
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About the Author:
Diane Amelia Read is an experienced growth partner, health and mindset advisor, stereotype disrupter, and surfer wannabe. She’s a Reiki Master Teacher, podcaster, StreetWise MBA graduate, and samba singer, Law of Attraction mentor, and motivational speaker.
Her mission is to make the world a more loving and interconnected place by helping women love themselves first so they can bring their most joy-filled awesomeness to everyone and everything else without depleting themselves
As a Mind & Body Alchemist For Women Over 50, Diane Amelia’s unique personal transformation toolbox is chock full of options for midlife women ready for sustainable improvement in their health, confidence, mindset, income, community, or all of the above.
