Protecting your energy in midlife means learning, one ordinary and overfull day at a time, to trust yourself when you’ve already done enough.
A Coffee Shop Conversation With Myself
My calendar is one of my best friends. It helps me guard my time and my energy.
When something new comes along, I can literally see when I’m about to cross into the territory of too much for me.
Why I’ve Become More Intentional With My Time
It wasn’t always that way.
Protecting Your Energy In Midlife, One Ordinary Day At A Time
These days, I have the privilege of making my own hours, and I’m grateful for that. My children are grown. I spend my days coaching parents, writing, volunteering, and now, as a first-time author, finding my footing in a new chapter of life.
I also have a few health conditions—nothing life-threatening, thank G-d—but they have a way of reminding me that energy is not unlimited.
And then there’s life itself. Grocery shopping. Laundry. Bills. Cooking (once in a while 😁). The ordinary things that quietly fill a day.
So, I’ve become more intentional about what I say yes to.
A Day That Was Already Enough
Today was a perfect example.
Two phone calls, for completely different reasons, both lasted much longer than expected. One included a couple of intensely emotional moments.
There was my early call with my wonderful VA, Chantal. A strength-training session. A trip to the grocery store. Driving through rain so heavy that manhole covers were popping off from the pressure of the water below. Roads closed. Then, later, spending thirty minutes in the basement during a tornado warning.
If I listed those things on a calendar, they wouldn’t look particularly overwhelming.
But they were enough.
By 4:30 this afternoon, my day felt complete.
Learning To Trust Myself
I may do some work tonight.
Or I may not.
The difference is that I no longer feel compelled to push through simply because there’s more I could do.
Instead, I’m learning to trust myself.
To listen when my body and my mind say, “That’s enough for today.”
For many years, I measured a good day by how much I accomplished.
Now I measure it differently.
- Did I contribute?
- Did I protect what mattered?
- Did I leave enough energy for tomorrow?
Healthy Limits Aren’t Weakness, They’re Wisdom
One of the lessons I keep relearning—whether from children, from dogs, or from life itself—is that healthy limits aren’t weakness. They’re wisdom. We encourage our children to recognize when they’re overwhelmed, yet so many of us ignore those same signals in ourselves.
Maybe one of the healthiest boundaries we can set isn’t with someone else.
Maybe it’s with the voice inside that keeps whispering, “Just one more thing…”
Knowing When Enough Is Enough
I’m at a stage in life where I want to add more meaning, more gratitude, and more joy to my days.
To contribute more than I consume.
And I’m discovering that I can only do that by recognizing when enough is enough.
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About the Author:
Fern Weis is a Parent Empowerment Coach for Moms of Teens and a Family Recovery Coach. She’s also a wife, a former middle school teacher, and the parent of two adult children who taught her more about herself than she ever could have imagined.
Fern partners with moms of teens and young adults, privately and in groups. She helps them grow their confidence to build strong relationships and emotionally healthier kids who become successful adults.
She knows first-hand that when parents do the work, the possibilities for change are limitless; that it’s never too late to start; and you don’t have to do it alone. Learn more about Fern at www.fernweis.com. Schedule your complimentary Parent Support Call at https://calendly.com/talktofern/discovery-call.
