Midlife & Beyond Dating: Illa Lynn
Growing up, I was led to believe that dating more than one person was cheating.
Perhaps this faulty belief was formed after women and girls who dated around were branded undesirable wife material. After all, marriage was a measure of women’s worth in society. There may also have been some underlying bias against female promiscuity in a small-town society, which prevented us from exploring what men unapologetically could. The moment you kissed someone, exclusivity was established.
Modern Day Freedoms:
“Women today have a lot more freedom when it comes to dating”
Women today have a lot more freedom when it comes to dating, thanks to old-fashioned dating concepts shifting in their favor. Despite the fact that the double standard still exists, there are fewer limitations and more opportunities for exploration now than there were in the past.
It is important to realize that everyone has unique relationship goals, preferences, and experiences. When compared to single-person dating, dating multiple people at the same time, also called rotation dating, may offer valuable insight and advantages.
5 Benefits Of Rotation Dating:
Here are the five benefits of the Rotation Dating, so you can determine for yourself whether this method of meet-cutes would be for you.
1.Expanding Your Dating Field
Dating multiple people allows you to broaden your dating realm and explore a diverse range of personalities, backgrounds, and interests. By engaging with different individuals, you open yourself up to new experiences and perspectives that can enrich and uplevel your romantic life. Each person you meet brings something unique to the table, and this diversity can help you learn more about yourself and your preferences in a potential partner.
2. Developing Emotional Awareness
“Exploring connections with different individuals exposes you to a variety of emotional dynamics and helps you identify what truly resonates with you”
One of the key benefits of dating multiple people at the same time, is the opportunity to develop a deeper understanding of your own emotions and needs. Exploring connections with different individuals exposes you to a variety of emotional dynamics and helps you identify what truly resonates with you at your core.
Having a high level of self-awareness is necessary for personal growth and expansion. Furthermore, it gives you the opportunity to make informed decisions about the kind of relationship you desire long-term. Rotation dating concept involves dating, but not getting intimate with either of the men, before narrowing down the person you wish to pursue exclusivity with.
“Why is that?”, you might ask.
You will bond quickly when you are intimate, and this can cloud your judgement as you might mistake the hormonal rush for falling in love. Unlike women, men are capable of being intimate without attachments, so they are more likely to disappear once they have slept with you. It is therefore highly recommended that you do not engage in any sexual activities during rotation dating as you are looking for an emotional connection first.
3. Enhancing Your Communication Skills
Effective communication lies at the heart of any successful relationship.
Dating multiple people teaches you how to express your thoughts, desires, and uphold boundaries. In order to navigate multiple connections simultaneously, engaging in open and honest conversations becomes second nature. In addition to strengthening your dating etiquette, these skills can be applied to other aspects of your personal and professional life.
4. Reducing Pressure and Expectations
“Getting to know multiple people has the benefit of cultivating a relaxed mindset”
It is common for traditional one on one dating to come with a great deal of pressure and expectations, which can lead to codependency and unhealthy attachments.
By exploring connections with multiple individuals simultaneously, you can alleviate some of this pressure and enjoy the journey rather than solely focusing on the outcome and why he hasn’t called you yet.
Getting to know multiple people has the benefit of cultivating a relaxed mindset, as it discourages you from becoming overly invested in one person before you really know them. In this way, you exercise your patience muscle, and foster a healthy mindset, which prioritizes growth and happiness for you.
5. Building Confidence, Self-Discipline and Self-Esteem
Dating multiple people can significantly boost your confidence and elevate your self-esteem. As you engage in various interactions and experiences, you gain a deeper understanding of your own value and what you can offer in a relationship. You will feel more attractive and desirable, which boost your pleasure hormones, elevates your feminine energy and bring more joy into your dating life.
Each connection serves as an opportunity to showcase your unique qualities, strengths, and interests. This process empowers you to embrace your individuality, become more self-assured and self-disciplined in your pursuit for Love, which attracts partners who appreciate you for who you truly are.
The best part is that you get to pick who goes to the next round & that in itself is a huge advantage you get to have.
Dating Multiple People Can Be Eye-Opening:
“Being less available will make you stand out, and men find that enticing.”
Dating multiple people simultaneously can be a transformative and eye-opening experience. It is essential to approach this dating style with honesty, integrity, and respect for all parties involved, meaning complete transparency if you are asked if you’re dating anyone else.
You may wonder how could I possibly manage juggling multiple men when I can barely get one to pay attention to me. Being less available will make you stand out, and men find that enticing.
Reframing the concept of “juggling” into “adventure” will also help you change your perspective on dating as work. There is something so thrilling about going on these adventures with men who each bring unique flavors to the experience, don’t you think?
Regardless of how you approach dating, the key is to find a path aligned with your values and relationship goals. Rotation Dating offers you a unique perspective that can help you figure out what truly matters and help you build meaningful relationships, and connections.
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About the Author:
Illa Lynn is a former corporate health care leader turned Life Coach who specializes in Relationship Coaching for women. In addition to her ten years of academic and professional training, she specializes in dating after 40. Specifically dating after divorce, or toxic love. Using her psychology background and intuitive nature, Illa helps women open up to love again. In three steps, Illa guides women to create lasting, authentic relationships founded on transparency, respect, and trust. Follow Illa on LinkedIN for more tips and tricks on dating.
