Gratitude Expert: Lori Saitz
The first of August was National Girlfriend Day.
It wasn’t until after my mom passed that I recognized what I’d learned from her regarding friendship. Not from anything she said, but from how she formed and nurtured hers.
My Aunties By My Side:
I grew up with a handful of aunts and uncles who weren’t related by blood. Aunt Carole and my mom were friends since kindergarten. Auntie Ann was her college roommate. Aunt Marlene was the neighbor who was summoned out of bed in the middle of the night to stay with me when my parents rushed to the hospital for the birth of my brother. Aunt Peggy was another of my mom’s confidantes. All remained lifelong friends.
And throughout her life, she kept adding more. She made friends everywhere she went. It’s not surprising that at the time of her death, my mom was in charge of membership for her quilting guild.
Now, I too, have and maintain friendships that go all the way back to the crib, to middle school, to college. And am continuously blessed to add more to my life.
“What draws people to be friends is that they see the same truth. They share it.”
Friendship, Girlfriends, And Gratitude:
How in the world would we make it through life without our girlfriends?
C.S. Lewis shared a slew of quotes on friendship.
“What draws people to be friends is that they see the same truth. They share it.”
“Friendship … is born at the moment when one (wo)man says to another “What! You too? I thought that no one but myself . . .”
In another, he reflects on the idea that we choose our friends. However, if not for being born when we were, lived where we did, chosen to attend a certain school or event, we wouldn’t have met. He puts forth the idea we are not in control of such decisions as we might think. It is the Universe, orchestrating these meetings so that it can “reveal to each of us the beauties of others.”
I would add so that it can allow others to reveal to us the beauty in ourselves as well.
Growth At Different Stages:
It’s amazing to reflect on the diversity of friendships you’ve developed throughout your life. Each bringing opportunities for growth at different stages. I’ve said it before, humans are wired to connect interpersonally. Friendship is imperative to our survival.
Let’s stop right here and offer up a moment of gratitude for the BFFs in our lives.
In addition to fate, not surprisingly, researchers have found that gratitude is very important for building and maintaining social relationships too. It plays a key role in the process by which we turn strangers into friends.
“There’s a snowball effect, which eventually leads to a solid, collaborative relationship.”
Respect With Girlfriends:
When you signal to someone you’ve noticed and value her kind actions, even if those actions are not initially directed at you, it’s more likely you will become a recipient of that kindness down the line.
On the other side of the coin, when someone voices gratitude for something you’ve done, it makes you value her more. Because this person has revealed that she respects you and is, therefore, more likely to be an ally. There’s a snowball effect, which eventually leads to a solid, collaborative relationship
Think about how you developed your most recent friendship. Yes, you were in the right place at the right time. And then, what was the process? Did the other person say or do something you appreciated? Most likely there was an exchange from which you both came away feeling appreciation. That feeling made you want to continue interacting with the other person and a friendship developed.
As you cultivate those friendships, be sure to continue expressing your thankfulness in whatever ways are uniquely you. Don’t assume others know you appreciate them. Letting your friends feel your gratitude, through words and actions, is how lifelong bonds are established.
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About the Author:
Lori Saitz loves sharing the power of gratitude and meditation with entrepreneurial professionals who hire her to help them boost business success and achieve life goals faster – without working harder. She is the CEO of Zen Rabbit, host of the podcast “FINE is a 4-Letter Word,” and a sought-after speaker. When she’s not working, you can find Lori in the weight room at the gym, because she also loves baking and eating. See more at the Zen Rabbit website and connect with her on LinkedIn.
